Nekomonogatari (White) : 017

After that, they had dinner (for future reference, they had bread for some reason. The kitchen didn’t only have a rice cooker, but a bread maker too. Apparently, the bread is a side dish to rice.), took a shower together again, washed themselves and, to restore their energy for the next day, Senjougahara Hitagi and Hanekawa Tsubasa fell asleep before ten.

And that’s my cue to wake up nyah.

Me, nyah, I am as you all know a new abnormality based on the Hindering Cat, the one that annoying Aloha named ‘Black Hanekawa’ nyah.

Steathily, without making a sound, I slipped out of my bed (unlike a vacuum cleaner, moving soundlessly is the speciality of a cat nyah)

“Nnngh, nyaaah!”

and stretched.

I’m guessing everyone already figured it out so I probably don’t need to explain, but when Mistress, nyah, Hanekawa Tsubasa sleeps, the chapters jump because it’s my turn on-stage nyah.

I’m just an abnormality so I don’t get it, but thanks to the know-how from Mistress, I know that sleeping doesn’t mean just resting the body, but resting the mind nyah — I’m not exactly the thinking type, and stuff like ‘spirituality’ doesn’t mean much of anything to me, so I don’t really know, but apparently, that ‘thinking’ thing living beings do can be a pretty big load nyah.

That’s why humans spend a third of every single day, a third of their entire lives, in the act of sleeping nyah.

Everyone sleeps.

Even Mistress sleeps.

But this time, the so-called ‘sleeping’ just isn’t enough rest for her mind nyah — it’s hard to say just how much Mistress realizes herself, I mean, I’m stupid and even I know, Mistress is really just too slow when it comes to her own ‘pain’, so slow that she might as well not feel it at all, but seeing the house she’s lived in for fifteen years burn down had a terrible impact on her mind, which is to say, her soul nyah.

That’s why I’m out and about nyah.

The third appearance of Black Hanekawa.

I guess with Golden Week, and then just before the Cultural Festival (wha?), this is my third appearance nyah.

Anyway nyah, you could say the me during Golden Week, the me before the Cultural Festival, and the me right are different beings — or as humans like to say, different people nyah.

Nyah? Or should that be different cats?

Anyway, just like how I can’t tell different humans apart, to a human the individual differences between the appearances of the Hindering Cat — of Black Hanekawa just isn’t something they need to identify me, not when it’s all pretty much the same nyah.

The point is, if we put it in terms of articles, we’d only ever use an ‘a’, and never a ‘the’. Maybe it’s easier if I say we don’t have a plural form, nyah?

If a human sees three will-o’-the-wisps, they wouldn’t be Wisp A, Wisp B and Wisp C, just ‘wisps’.

So I’m not Hanekawa C, but I’m not Hanekawa 3 either — I’m just Black Hanekawa nyah.

Hope y’all can keep that in mind nyah.


I said this and headed to the changing room.

And then I looked at the mirror.

Hair transformed to pure white.

Cat ears growing out from my head.

Big, round cat eyes.

When I first ‘awoke’ in the ruins of that tutorial school, there hadn’t been a mirror and all I could do was try to figure out what was going on (and though I totally trust Mistress, even without looking in the mirror, with these sweats, I could tell something’s not right with her fashion sense) and when I ‘awoke’ this morning, I was still pretty sleepy and didn’t do a thing, but cats are nocturnal nyah, my brain just doesn’t work when the Sun’s up.

So basically, this is the first time I’ve looked into a mirror nyah.

“Mmmmn. Cat ears really look totally different with short hair nyah.”

I washed my face while looking over these very important things.

People in this country used to say that a cat washing its face brings rain the next day, but this is totally unrelated nyah.

I left the changing room and took the key on top of the wardrobe. Of course, it’s the key to the front door nyah.

That shady human bastard Araragi Koyomi has probably thought before that I’m so stupid I can’t even use a key, let me tell you nyah, that’s just a load of crap, I do too know use a key. Don’t look down on us humanoid abnormalities nyah.

Moving steathily — steathily so that I don’t wake up this Senjougahara Hitagi, who’s some kind of friend to Mistress, I silently opened the door, and just as silently locked it again.

Well, I say ‘friend’ nyah, but she’s supposed to Mistress’ enemy. It’s probably weird for me to be so careful around her, then, but nyah, I’m just following Mistress’ wishes.

At least the Mistress,

has never hated this woman.

Not even once,


I didn’t put on any shoes.

It’s hard to move in those things nyah.

I’d like to keep using my toes, thank you.


By the way, there’s probably some people worrying that, since I’m out and about when Mistress is sleeping, doesn’t that mean she isn’t resting at all?

Thanks for the concern nyah.

But it’s all right.

It’s fine nyah.

I’m a ‘balancer’ to Mistress’ mind, so to speak — basically, it actually heals Mistress’ mind when I’m ‘out’, even when I’m doing nothing nyah.

And it’s not a problem at all physically because this isn’t tiring. I’m an abnormality, so even when I use a human body, I move the flesh using totally different principles, so Mistress’ body is probably more restful right now than it is when she sleeps nyah.

Besides, think about this for a second.

No matter how good Mistress is at making beds, there’s no way you can sleep well on a desk in a bundle of cardboard without aching all over — that thing isn’t a bed, it’s a hair-messer-upper nyah. And it’s all very nice and touching to sleep in the same bed as a friend who would cry for you, which granted is miles better than what she was sleeping in before, but it’s pretty normal to not sleep well with a new bed and pillow nyah.

I don’t mean to brag, but it not ending up like that, and Mistress getting her ‘refreshing’ and healthy beauty sleep, is all thanks to me nyah.

I’m the incarnation of Mistress’ stress, in other words, the symbol of her ‘tiredness’, so by cutting me away like this, Mistress herself should get some peace and quiet.

Though that may not be the whole story, the fact that Mistress doesn’t know what being ‘half-awake’ means is all thanks to me too nyah.

That human bastard compared me to a nightmare, but I don’t know if that’s a coincidence or he’s really that sharp — I’m like ‘sleep’ itself to Mistress.

Her dreams nyah.

But, well, when that’s not enough to cover it, then like Golden Week, I’ll just go around and use my Energy Drain on whatever humans I can find — but don’t worry nyah.

I’m not going to be doing anything so over-the-top this time.

There’s no point nyah.

Besides, like that human bastard says, the way I appear like this, I’m like the after-effects of the abnormality, the echo of it — in the end, I’m just a phenomenon and nothing else nyah.

Like el Niño, nyah. El Niñyah?

There’s not much I can do nyah.

Just, make sure she doesn’t get any nightmares.

I can’t do much except come out like this nyah.

This is the best I can do to take care of Mistress’ mental side of things — that’s pretty much the same as doing nothing, though.

But nyah, like Aloha says, ‘every abnormality has its fitting reasons’, so maybe, even if I’m just an echo, just a hallucination, I still do have some meaning nyah.

Well, you can’t do what you can’t do.

I’ll just do what I can.

As much as I can nyah.


Looking at it like this, the me right now and the me from before really are different beings — I don’t feel like making things work out or forcing things to get solved at all nyah.

Looks like I’ve gotten soft, if I do say so myself.

But cats are soft, obviously.

Nyah, that’s not right.

Mistress’ the one who’s gotten soft.

We say ‘abnormalities’ and ‘humans’, but ultimately, Mistress and I are the same being, so if Mistress softens up, then I’ll curl up too.

I don’t need to wait for winter nyah.

Don’t even need a kotatsu to sleep under.

Mistress has thought a lot about that Senjougahara Hitagi and her ‘rebirth’, and gets really excited about having that Araragi Koyomi bastard reborn (she got teased for her ‘rehab program’) but even Mistress has been reborn, I think, compared to before.

Maybe not ‘reborn’, but ‘restructured’?

I can watch Mistress from within, from inside her heart — I know this well about her nyah.

Well, her family situation was like that nyah.

It’d probably be weird if she hadn’t started going off in the wrong direction.

It’s just like Mistress for her wrong directions to lead to being an honor student — though she’s dropped her act as an honor student, too, cutting her hair and taking off her glasses.

There’s been a lot of opinions about that from people around her, but to me, it’s nothing but a good thing nyah.

I agree with Senjougahara Hitagi there.

I’ll completely disappear one day.

Disappear, gone.

This is a transition period nyah — where Mistress is being completed.

You could say that something like me is just a delusion of puberty nyah.

No matter how long you wait until you go out to discover the world, by the time you do come back,

everyone will have forgotten the imaginary friend they made up when they were kids, nyah.

Well, it’d be a lie to say it’s not a bit lonely, but this has been my role since the very beginning, and I won’t go against the flow.

With every meeting comes a parting.

Abnormalities are just the same.

I just have to do what I can —

“Nyan-nyan — here?”

I didn’t go down the stairs, but leapt onto the roof of this apartment, Warren Villa, and carefully watched everything in a complete circle around me.

“No — here.”

Well nyah.

If you ask me why I got out of bed and left the room — what I was doing if I wasn’t trying to Energy Drain someone, then, nyah, a walk at night, I guess?

When I ‘came out’ in the ruins, and this morning, this sort of ‘action’ is really what I should’ve been doing right away, but even I need some time to prepare nyah.

Now, nyah.

“Mmn. Mmmn. There we go nyah.”

It didn’t take long for me to find my target — as soon as I did, without a sound, I flew.

Yeah, cats can fly nyah.

Nyah, that’s a lie.

But the jumping power of Black Hanekawa can overcome mountains — though I was being careful not to make a sound, so not this time.

If I really jumped seriously, the apartment under my feet would collapse nyah.

Still, this is enough for a five-hundred-meter jump.

There’s no need to keep quiet after coming this far, so I landed with a boom, crashing straight through into the asphalt.

It was a road, with not a single car passing by in the night.

And right in front of me,

was a tiger nyah.



  1. brego1

    Black Hanekawa is back. Yeah!

    SHAFT better animate those Hanekawa/Senjougahara showers in excruciating detail.

    Thanks for the translation.

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